I go to therapy.
Therapy is my form of self-care. Just like food, rent, and utilities, therapy sessions are a non-negotiable part of my budget. For 45 minutes every other week, I meet with a kind, older woman who listens, nurtures my self-awareness, and offers me strategies to cope with difficult situations. It took me a long time to find someone I trusted. Talking to someone about past trauma and day-to-day challenges isn’t easy (even for poet who readily shares her emotions). The time I spent searching for a therapist I could confide in, though, was incredibly worthwhile.
Therapy is not something you do if “something is wrong with you”. Therapy is not just for the wealthy. Therapy is not just for times of crises. I’m glad to see social media campaigns and community conversations striving to de-stigmatize therapy. I have been going to therapy on a consistent basis for over two years now. Initially, I was hesitant let others know. It’s easier to say, “Hey! I’m on my way to take care of my body at a gym session” than to say, “Hey! I’m on my way to take care of my mental-health at a therapy session!”. Ultimately, my determination to heal and develop healthy emotional-awareness was stronger than my fear of what others would think of me.
Given the distinct nature of graduate school and graduate school programs—and because we each cope differently—take time to figure out how to best care for your mental-health. Many universities are striving to prioritize students’ mental-health. Unfortunately, I believe there is still a long way to go before universities are well-equipped to serve students’ mental-health needs. In the meantime, then, we must look out for ourselves.
Explore your options. Maybe individual or group talk-therapy sessions will work for you. And/or, you may need to see a psychiatrist and figure out a medication plan that actually helps you feel better. There are many resources. I recommend setting a plan for yourself at the beginning of the semester. Figuring out what works best can be tough to do when you’re feeling down so I recommend scheduling appointments when you feel okay. Remember: you are not alone. Talk to someone you really trust for support.
How you care for your mental health should be your choice and your decision. What works for someone else may not work for you, and that is okay.
During a particularly dark time, my therapist told me: “I know you don’t believe me right now, but you will be okay. I know you will be okay.” There are days when no matter how brightly the sun shines, you won’t feel its warmth. I’ve been there before so I won’t tell you that “the sun will shine again” (especially if you live somewhere where it’s always shining). Instead, if you are going through a tough time right now, I gift you this encouragement:
“You will feel the sunshine again.
Believe me when I say, you will be okay.”
Con cariño,
Jenesis